Posts Tagged ‘eminem’

Damaged People…

I would like to say I was “challenged” to write a blog on this topic and yes I’m always up for a challenge. Even though my thoughts on this topic my conflict with popular knowledge or what your local therapist may think… I still feel I’m suited to give insight to “damaged people” because I think I’ve damaged a few people and I’m not scared to admit I’m damaged goods myself, but who isn’t “damaged,” honestly?

Any type of emotional pain can scare the psyche and really do harm to the “id,” the “ego” or the “super-ego.” Anyway you look at it; anything that takes us down a notch can have a damaging effect on us mentally. How we carry that affliction is what separates us for in the long run.

To me “damaged people” come in three separate groups:

1. Those who can accept (not except) that they’ve been “hurt” or “damaged” emotionally.

I’d throw myself in this category because I’m pretty open. Once I’ve accepted something I try to learn from it and grow from it. I’ve had my heart broke, my feelings hurt, my life almost taken from me, but I still stand tall and face adversity like it’s nothing. Why?

Because life isn’t suppose to be a challenge, it’s a gift. No matter what happens to me or what type of damage is inflicted, I can’t let it effect me. I have a purpose in life and I was blessed with more than one chance to prove myself. Now no matter what “they” say, I’ll always be better than what they “say.” I can embrace the hate or the love and make it into fuel that keeps me driven towards my goals. I only fear indifference and that to me is the most damaging thing… And some people know that, but again… I try not to let it “damage” me.

2. Those who hold-on to their pain and never let it go no matter what.

You ever see someone who has a goiter?

It’s a pretty nasty sight to see and it reminds me of these people. The people that hold on to the past and can’t move on or see what gifts the present has for them. They let this pain… This damage inflicted on them run their lives. They become spiteful, say hurtful things and carry on as if the world is their trash bin because someone messed them up. I know this type very well and frankly I feel bad for them because like that goiter that’s growing from that woman’s neck; they can’t help, but carry their pain with them forever…

The world is full of these types. The Hitlers of the world… The nerd who becomes a CEO and picks on his/her employees who remind them of that person who picked on them in middle school… The police officer who didn’t have the balls to do something as a member of regular society so their gun and badge is where they hide their pain and where they inflict it as well…

These are the most dangerous damaged people to me… They embody negative energy and most of the time channel it to others through manipulation/games. They strive for control in relationships just so they can inflict more damage, but they have one ultimate failing that is usually they’re downfall. ===> They’re always are going to be unhappy because they can’t ever let go of the pain that makes them act the way they do. I feel sorry for these types because living out of spite doesn’t get you too far.

3. Those who use their pain as a crutch.

I know people like this too. They whine about a breakup or a lose till everyone is sick of them. I can relate too it as well and looking back, I’ll admit I was a mess because not only did I let it affect me. I let it linger into my social circle and mess things up to the point where I took the piss (as the British would say) literally… (see Dented Beamers & I Saw The Bitch Who Peed In My Car). People can go on and on with their pain and suffering, but won’t let go till something drastic happens. I can’t justify anything I did when my damaged ass used my emotions as a crutch. I was off in my own world. I began to write this blog back then and I started to renovate myself out of clear spite and I wasn’t ashamed to admit it.

To this day I kind of feel like that chapter in my life was the biggest waste of time ever, but I take from it not the damage, but the thought that I can do better. Which I clearly have, which kind of erases the damage in my eyes. 🙂

If you want to move up… Sometimes you need to move on

I came up with that quote sometime last year and I took it upon myself to live up to it because I refuse to be another sad and damaged person. As humans we’re breed to hate one another. Breed to point a finger at someone who is giving us a problem. We’re breed to inflict damage on each other…

Myself… I just take it all in and do me. I’m someone who’s breed on knowledge of self and determination. 😉 I spread love… Anything less would be uncivilized. 🙂

And even though I’m “damaged” in someway, I don’t let that shit phase me, run me or destroy me. I let it go…


…:::MOOD MUSIC:::…

Eminem – Brain Damage

“Brain damage, ever since the day I was born/ Drugs is what they used to say I was on/ They say I never knew which way I was goin/ But everywhere I go they keep playin my song” – Eminem

Read Full Post »


Much love to HustleGRL for the off the chain graphic work on the cover art!

There’s 3 version of this song that exist

1. Drake ft. Lil Wayne & Nickelus F – Forever (Original Version)

2. Drake ft. Lil Wayne & Nut Da Kid – Forever (Young Money Version)

3. This one…

The first one only a few people including myself have… I like the 1st one best cause everyone comes off equally and the chemistry between the 3 is way better. The version we got here is straight… I’m fucking with it because of the names on it alone and Boi 1da killed the track!

The original might surface sooner or later, but we’ll see…

Enjoy this one though…

“It may mean nothing y’all, but understand that nothing was done for me. so I don’t plan on stopping at all/ I WANT THIS SHIT FOREVER MANE…”

D/L: ===> Drake ft. Lil Wayne, Kanye West & Eminem – Forever (Produced by Boi 1da)

LISTEN: ===> Drake ft. Lil Wayne, Kanye West & Eminem – Forever (Produced by Boi 1da)

Read Full Post »

I’m kinda liking all the Eminem stuff that’s leaked. He seems to not give a fuck again. I like that Eminem (No Rainbow)

Dr. Dre goes in on this one too ( I wonder who wrote this jawn for him?)

LISTEN: ===>Eminem ft. Dr. Dre – Old Time’s Sake

D/L: ===> Eminem ft. Dr. Dre – Old Time’s Sake



I got this one up on STR8HIPHOP.COM, but missed it in the blog 😦

The 3AM video… So creepy…

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Read Full Post »


So he’s really back on that shit… My nigga. Classic Eminem madness. He goes in on that same shit that made him Slim Shady


“It’s 3am & here I come so you should probably run…” – Eminem

D/L: ===> Eminem – 3AM

LISTEN: ===> Eminem 3AM


Read Full Post »

I missed you Em… (pause) I like the new jawn!

D/L:===> Eminem – We Made You

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Read Full Post »


run_dmcRUN DMC was the first Hip Hop music I got a taste of back in 1986. I remember rockin’ out to this on Z100 when it used to play like a good mix of everything that was hot!

When I heard this it sent me swangin! I had to buy the album. (Refer to my 1st blog ever Where Is The LOVE? to get more insight on how I fell in LOVE with the music).

I copped their album Raising Hell and it made me look at things a whole lot differently and looking back I think it was a time in my life that I can remember vaguely, but cherish  because it kind of set me to go down a meaningful path with myself at a young age. I started to become interested in music, art and writing. I was only 5 or 6 at the time and that was MONUMENTIOUS!

So first off, I want to thank RUN-DMC for being the inspiration that’s made me want to do this FOREVER….

And when I think about home and where it all started Jamaica, Hollis, Queens Village and even the Southside… I smile and think to myself everything I LOVE came from Queens. Family, Life Long Friends, Places and Experiences…

From my first crush to my first kiss it was in Queens… Today, things from the motherland (Queens) seem to have come back into my life and blessed me again, but that’s another blog and another day.

I’m kind of tearing up here (tears of joy) cause to me everything that once meant so much to me is starting to comeback to light and I owe to… Well… They know who they are and I’m thankful for them bringing back that memory for me.

negativeI used to tend to dwell on the negatives of my past to keep me from making the same mistakes again, but that kinda brings you back to the negative because in every negative situation you can pick the positives out of it and find yourself going back to that shit like people who are addicted to drugs… OR… PERFECT EXAMPLE a bad relationship (“Break Ups, To Make Up”) you go back to what you feel comfortable doing, but if shit ain’t gonna change where’s it going?

I went though it for a good part of 2 years and apparently a couple of my close friends are now too (thank goodness I ain’t trapped up anymore, but I’ll hold y’all down when the shit hits the fan again).

AS I see it the line between “what’s good for us” and “what’s been good to us” is thin and can blur our thinking sometimes… It can be blurred up to the point where you want to say, fuck it I’m gonna go all in cause this is all I got going for me right now, but you know what?

When I think a thing like “HOME” (Queens) all I can remember is THE GOODNESS and that’s all I really want. Nothing else, but GOOD. So I’m going to carry that notion with me no matter where I end up geographically, relationship wise or in life in general. IF you strive for what is meaningful, right, and GOOD you’ll see the best outcomes down the line.

And even though life is moving at a moderate pace for me right now I’m not gonna slow walk it out, I’ma go HARD, so I can go HOME because no place has brought me the experiences and people that Queens has.

PAUSE===> Now this is no disrespect to everyone I’m close to now. I love y’all like fam, F, Kenny, Shaun, Ali, Julie, Aby, Shkeema, Teresa, Jared, Kofi (even though you are from BK), Alex (BK again..), KJ, BB, Nammi, Jeny, My French Tutor, C4, my wonderful work crew, of course Lois Lame and if I forgot you it’s early and I’m buggin’… SORRY DAWG (SIDE NOTE: Aby you’re right, I can’t see you saying “dawg” or “dogg” that’s so odd…). Y’all mean the world and drive me with every bit of insight my crazy ass has taken in and spilled over time.

It’s just the most SPECIAL of the SPECIAL seems to have come from this part of town and I think in retrospective it’s a sign… We’ll see…

SO let’s go back and focus on RUN-DMC being inducted to the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame. Below is video of the induction with Eminem, Rev Run, DMC & their families… R.I.P. Jam Master Jay…

This is milestone for Hip Hop and Queens. I come from the greatest Borough in NY (Sorry Brooklyn…) and when I finally come back home, I’m gonna smile and say, “we did it because this is the HEART of NY…”

H Diddy Blogger… Out

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Read Full Post »

Since I don’t post much music, but I had to bless ya’ll before I write about “MY ADDICTION.”

Get at me people. It’s gonna be a cold winter… -H

They should call me MR DID IT FIRST…

D/L ===> Kanye West – Heartless (Complete Unmastered Mix)

D/L ===> Kanye West – Coldest Winter (Radio Rip)

D/L ===> Sophia Fresh ft. Kanye West – What It Is

D/L ===> Eminem – I’m Having A Relapse 

D/L ===> Coldplay ft. Jay-Z – Lost (Remix)


Read Full Post »